I feel like this will start as many free bleeding posts start, at least the ones I have read... I realized I always sort of practiced free bleeding, except maybe when my period was a new and terrifying thing.
you see I've always been "lazy" about products. I have a super heavy flow like the other two women in my family... changing a tampon as often as needed to prevent leaks got tiresome, and I was still messing up my panties. especially since we redid our bathroom and now have no cabinets. only a small cup with 2-3 tampons in it at a time. this doesn't last long during the special week in my house since my mom mostly synced up with me. when I go in there aren't usually any left. by the time I discover this I've already finished my business and I'm not about to go back out to the closet and get one and go back in the bathroom.
I have also found tampons make my cramps much worse. this isn't something I've seen many people discuss. I'm guessing it's because like my mother, most women don't really go without for long enough to notice. however after a few times without it began to make sense to me. I've found this true with most internal products, as I do have a cup as well, but I'll get to that.
I also dislike tampons because they make me "off". by that I mean I am prone to yeast infections and bv... something so simple as a tampon is enough sometimes.
Sleeping was always an issue for me... so many mornings in my teen years I woke up embarrassed by my stained panties, pajamas, and even sheets. pads never worked, so once I switched to tampons during the day I also wore them at night... they worked slightly better but the string would always do me in acting like a rope ladder for all the blood wishing to escape. after a while I'd get into bed and realize I forgot to put one in after my shower and figure why bother when it makes a mess anyway?
for me, the cons of tampons were quickly adding up. I found myself avoiding them more and more and not really having much more of a leakage problem than I did with them... how strange?
for christmas I asked for a menstrual cup... it works great... sometimes.
1. supposedly this cup is enough to hold your entire period. well I must be super bleeder or something because I HAVE overflowed the cup. by this I literally mean there was too much to be contained, not that I did not place it properly and it leaked.
2. I have a tilted uterus... this means that placing a cup is hard even on the best days. the best days you may ask? well you see your uterus is not cemented down. it sort of floats around in there and sometimes it's lower or higher or more tilted ect... frequently I can't even effectively wear my cup.
3. if it's not properly placed, it leaks. as I said I often can't get it in right with my tilted uterus, so it often leaks for me.
so after a few months of my cup working and then suddenly not I was really not ready to got back to tampons. so I didn't.
But how?! how is that possible with such a heavy flow? well, I'm fairly convinced this is what our bodies were designed to do, and all the products we use are a big scam (like douching really). they help "solve" a problem that wasn't really a problem in the first place.
sleeping is something I hear many women worry about... I am receiving my wonderful monthly gift right now, and last night I stayed at my boyfriend's house (and all weekend!). I slept last night with no protection from my womanly horror. I woke up... to completely clean sheets. clean underwear.
lets talk about the design of the vagina. I mean it's a very intricate thing, even though it may look like God was drunk while making it. the design generally keeps things inside... unless of course you have a nice little rope ladder leading the way out... or even an extra absorbent pad drawing it out like a magnet. without these things your blood is pretty content to stay inside. yes. even if you bleed heavily with a pad, you'll be fine without it, the pad draws it out of you!
lets think of it like those cups that have a hole for straws, the ones with little silicone flaps. if you hold it upside down it generally won't leak. really your vagina works in the same way... this also means that you can't hold it upside down forever without a leak.
so it's not perfect? well no, not exactly. just like tampons and pads, you'll probably have some slips. however, if you know your body, it's not very hard to prevent leaks.
I suggest everyone try it once, it really is freeing. but how? well...
invest in some cotton panties, dark or patterned help hide slip ups if you're worried about it. then start by going to the bathroom every hour. if you're good try every two hours... now is the part where I tell you that if you can't pee every two hours you are most likely dehydrated. I have a good heavy flow and 2hrs is usually good for me with minimum activity to not leak. if you're grossed out by your period you're probably not likely to try free bleeding anyway, but if you want to feel extra fresh you can use baby wipes... HOWEVER! it is important to use toilet paper AFTER. you want to be completely dry. this means wipe away all the blood and moisture. any left behind will work as an escape route for the blood inside.
really, that's it. you just need to learn your body and you'll figure out when you need to go to prevent leaks. see when you "go" it opens up your lady parts a bit and allows the build up to come out (probably more noticeable for a heavy flow). clean up afterward and you're good for another two hours or so.
I currently don't care about any of my panties, so I am lazy about preventing leaks. I never stain pants though... which is another reason I believe free bleeding is the way things are supposed to be, even with my laziness I have yet to stain jeans... which I did while using pads AND tampons. as a way to prove free bleeding can work better than tampons, next month I am going to free bleed the way you would use a tampon... basically with the ultimate goal to be not bleeding on my panties.
but why free bleeding you might ask? well... I am tired of being ashamed of my period. I'm tired of thinking of it as something gross. it's just blood. it means I'm a woman. it means I can create life. it's symbolism should be respected and embraced.
I can honestly say a leak from free bleeding isn't the same. I don't look at the red smear on my thigh and feel like a disgusting failure. when you stop treating your period as a sickness or problem the blood becomes less gross somehow. the red is just red, blood like any other blood on you... not leakage from something that is supposed to contain some horrible, embarrassing, monthly punishment.
so I encourage anyone reading to try the same... for long enough to really decide if it works for you, because it will take more than a day to get the hang of how your body works... and for those of you who worry about what your man will think... don't. I'm fairly certain all the "helpful" ways to deal with a period are the product of men deciding our periods were a problem in the first place. besides this, I'm convinced any man can be brought around to at least accept periods even if they don't necessarily embrace them.
I'll update next month with my experiences.
lastly, this has me thinking about how I'll handle my future daughter's period... maybe I'll get her a cup? I do understand that periods are confusing for a long time, and trying to free bleed in school would be embarrassing, stressful, and difficult as it takes a while to really know your body. I think I also my write a blog entry for my future daughter.
